Hi! Many readers will know that I have been spending a great deal of time campaigning for local environment and wildlife. I have quite honestly spent too much time on it.
Another Relapse
My readers will also know that my health has taken another nose dive. And just when I thought I was recovering I suffered another allergic reaction with yet more ambulance trips to A&E assisted by paramedics. More EpiPens, more adrenaline, more steroids, more antihistamines. Back on 100% bedrest, marooned upstairs in my bedroom. This has been a massive wake up call for me.

People’s Aggression
When only this week news of the much campaigned for Community Liaison Panel for the development here has finally come to fruition. Which I spent weeks earlier in the year campaigning for. Another fire happened in the wood. And it was bad. I was faced with yet more aggression, devisive behaviour and quite honestly abuse. And I have had enough.

The land management company that are in place to manage the wood are not playing ball. They won’t communicate with the community. And that in itself is creating so much stress for everyone. But I have taken things as far as I can take them. I will not beg them. And I’m sick of they’re vague reasoning and excuses. Two of a kind with the Developer it would seem.
And when it came to receiving messages in my inbox about conspiracy theories and goodness knows what else I just thought I have had enough.
Enough Time Volunteered
I have spent hours reading (which as a pwME is difficult for me), researching, questioning, emailing, liaising, reaching out, trying to be diplomatic, information sharing, smoothing over local angst. Trying to stop the people protesting because they might mess up a potential care for the wood and create havoc. And I have just come to the conclusion I don’t have to deal with this anymore and I’m not going to.

Saying No
So I have a put post up on my wood page to tell everyone. I am going to focus my energy on my health, on my blog, on things I love. On craft on hopefully doing a bit more podcasting. People are just going to have to get off their behinds and find out for themselves. I’m not spoonfeeding them or taking their rubbish anymore.
So if you are a campaigner and you also manage a long term health condition or disability, please consider your well being. And know where you have to draw the line. People really don’t care. People have really weird agendas.

Opinions
I think probably the funniest comments I’ve had from local trumped up pompous and aggressive keyboard warriors is the ‘I’ve lived here for X number of years, (ie since the Jurassic Period) explain yourself and your actions you upstart and I may be prepared to listen!’

Note *I myself have lived here quite a few years.
And your point is what exactly? My question then to you is what exactly have you done, what have you contributed, what have you proactively done to ensure the future of the local environment? As far as I can tell, naff all! So naff off!
Social Responsibility
And as for property developers/house builders they need to put more measures in place to give greater consideration to the mental well being of communities impacted by their overinflated developments. They do not care about local people at all. They have zero moral compass. Zilch. Nada!

I have had enough and I am having a break from local campaigning. Possibly permanently. And if one more person says to me “stay strong” ie. ‘Because we want you to carry on doing this for us because we can’t be assed‘, I will scream. I am not strong, I am strong willed and determined, but physically and cognitively I am not strong. I’m not inspirational. I just care deeply about the future of this planet.
Coming to My Senses

So those are my thoughts for the day, which really became very clear over the past 24 hours. It is down to the people who get paid to do these things, to wisely manage these assets. They need to get on with it and stop treating the local environment and people like a convenience. Yes a toilet! And stop relying on a person beavering away in the shadows at the point of collapse. Well, who actually has collapsed. Several times. Overdoing it is exactly why my health collapsed in 2004. Will I ever learn? Yes I will! This time I will.
Closing Thoughts
Not everyone is horrible, many are lovely, do care and are proactive. Or just don’t know where to go with any of it. Because everyone avenue is a door shut in your face. And we have little to be proactive with. Mere threads, if that. I hope they will pick up the baton and move forward with whatever they can muster. Because right now, I have to let go. I’m done! But hopefully Heybridge Wood and its wildlife isn’t!

So that’s my thoughts. Thanks for listening. I’d go crazy without the blogging world.
The End!
Have a blessed day⚘


Wow Penny such a nice blog and I am very sorry to hear that you got an illness shortly after recovering from the other one. I pray you get better😊👏
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Thank you, that’s very kind of you Mthobisi.
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I read this during my early morning feed with my bubs! Thank you for writing this and being totally honest with how you feel at the moment. All those months of campaigning would not have gone to waste, it has had a bigger impact than you know! You’re amazing for fighting for nature but you’re just as amazing when you need to rest and look after yourself. Being YOU is incredible! Praying you feel much stronger soon. X
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Aww bless you Ellie, thank you SO much. This means more than you can possibly know reading this from you. I woke up indecisive, but leaned in knowing if I am going to recoup my health I have to stop. I am so incredibly blessed to have such caring people in my life. Bless you & thank you. Xxx
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